when you know something doesnt fit in the fridge but you force the door shut and let it fall out on someone else
i may act like i’m sassy but if you’re mean to me there is a 900% chance i’ll cry
I use sarcasm because flat out telling you you’re a fucking moron is considered inappropriate and is frowned upon. And I was raised better than that.
i got 99 problems and 97 of them are due by the end of the week
The other two were due last week
what if guys came coffee… i’ll have one ejaculatte please
I just spit out my coffee
You’re supposed to swallow it
I have paid over $600 in two days for my stupid car. Between registration, insurance, and my normal car payment, I’m fucking broke.